I was driving down the highway and made the mistake of slipping in the audio disk for Terry Pratchett’s Guards! Guards! I could have been arrested on the spot for driving under the influence of intense laughter. Truly I had to pull off the road at the nearest rest stop I was laughing so hard and loud about Carrot (the 6′ 6″ dwarf who has been drafted into the Watch Guards), Sergeant Vimes, and the SuperMaster Villain who all reside in a colossal comedic stew that is Ankh-Morpork, the center of Pratchett’s deliciously delirious Discworld.
Given the Lancelots, Hobbits, Narnias and Muggles of Hogwarts that run through English Fantasy EntertainaLit it is useful to have the irony-squared antidote for all these adventurous heros – and that is definitely the Guards, dwindled down to five, for the million residents of Ankh-Morpork. Given that Thieves have become a Guild (oh Wall Street so well penned), there is scarcely business enough for these five – Sgt Vimes as rhymes with imbibing the Vines is leader of the constabulary dis-staff, Corporal Colon is self explanatory, Carrot is the newby, Knobby is of undecided origin, and Elixir is the stuff of life.
And suddenly, these Konstabulary Keystoners have to deal with a bunch of Robbin Hoodz whose goonish greedience of course slips out of control – and unleashes dragon-winged unintended consequences on the Denizens of Discworld and Ankh-Morpork. And this sets off a hilarious turn ….
And now for the bad news. For $8 you can get the written edition … for $80 dollars you can get the infinitely better and more entertaining audio edition. Thank you, librarians at Port Hope Public, for going with the audio edition. It really is that good.
I could take more than a Fifth of these Spirits anytime, any day and any week.